how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
