I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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