He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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