I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
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