Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
