that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
