my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
