Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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