It's Friday. Sex?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
You left your phone here
Wait...
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
