11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
this is an emotional support booty call
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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