i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
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Be still, my beating vagina.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
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And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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