operation have a gay friend backfired
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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