guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I didn't notice because vodka
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
