A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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