I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
