If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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