are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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