So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
