he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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