the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
