i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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