Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Randomize
