your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
