Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize