So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize