ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
