Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
