State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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