you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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