Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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