Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
