If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
