isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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