So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
