It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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