Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize