doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
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The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
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If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking