I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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