Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
