Texts From Last Night

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  (541): View more from Oregon

  In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?

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  (541): In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it? http://tfl.nu/ati9
  Replies (6) Good night (922) Bad night (1395)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.

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  (416): She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up. http://tfl.nu/q0c1
  Replies (7) Good night (620) Bad night (1791)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.

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  (757): everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date. http://tfl.nu/pynx
  Replies (36) Good night (949) Bad night (4259)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.

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  (613): Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors. http://tfl.nu/tkq1
  Replies (20) Good night (8529) Bad night (1152)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?

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  (203): i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today? http://tfl.nu/2t0w
  Replies (20) Good night (5196) Bad night (1082)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.

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  (419): Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won. http://tfl.nu/dkj1
  Replies (3) Good night (2664) Bad night (944)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.

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  (903): So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that. http://tfl.nu/z5my
  Replies (18) Good night (1897) Bad night (892)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.

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  (952): Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead. http://tfl.nu/k34x
  Replies (6) Good night (555) Bad night (1784)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...

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  (786): the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words... http://tfl.nu/e7uv
  Replies (0) Good night (1028) Bad night (501)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"

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  (613): He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know" http://tfl.nu/d7uq
  Replies (8) Good night (984) Bad night (646)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him

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  (270): He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him http://tfl.nu/fwi5
  Replies (0) Good night (365) Bad night (269)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Of course. Go big or go home.

  (330): View more from Ohio

  You're my fucking queen.

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  (330): Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship? (856): Of course. Go big or go home. (330): You're my fucking queen. http://tfl.nu/faru
  Replies (1) Good night (874) Bad night (293)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this

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  (319): Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this http://tfl.nu/dy6c
  Replies (4) Good night (325) Bad night (622)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome

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  (713): I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome http://tfl.nu/qeoi
  Replies (7) Good night (1162) Bad night (237)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear

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  (816): Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear http://tfl.nu/9j32
  Replies (4) Good night (352) Bad night (641)

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