I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Randomize
