i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
