remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
