remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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