i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
