highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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