Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Apparently you make a good broom.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Never joke about your clitoris.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
