He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
