Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
