So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.