So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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