is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
3pm strippers are depressing
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
